Panic. Let me count the ways

I was asked by a journalist whether a panic attack is worse than a paper cut? In response to this question and to indicate the severity, allow me to list all of the things that I would rather experience than have a panic attack;

  • A kick in the vag
  • A kick in the vag from a person wearing boots
  • Stubbing my toe every hour on the hour
  • Falling face-first into dog sh**
  • Accidentally deleting all of my phone contacts
  • Accidentally deleting all of my Instagram followers
  • Giving up alcohol for life
  • Doing a skydive dressed as a budgie
  • A daily bitch slap from Ru Paul. (Tbf, that would be an honour).
  • Plucking out twenty nose hairs with rusty tweezers.

I’m sure you get the point. What about you, what would you rather experience than panic? Share with me on Instagram.


1 Comment

  1. August 5, 2019 / 3:25 pm

    The first thing I think of when I read ‘panic attack’ is all the times at my last job where I would have a panic attack and go cry in the bathroom. I’m so glad I left because my life has waaaay less panic in it now. It’s nice to pinpoint and eliminate when possible!

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